Scrolling through social media on any given day, you’re bombarded by self-help gurus, high-performance influencers, and coaches telling you that they have the secret formula to fix your life. They tell you that if you just wake up at 0400, jump in an ice bath, drink their specific blend of supplements, and white-knuckle your way through their fitness program or their mindset program, then your internal chaos will magically disappear.
In the veteran community especially, we are constantly sold this lie of supreme self-reliance. We are told that we can out-grind, out-work, and out-discipline our trauma, our anger, and our struggles.
I know this because I used to live there and subscribe to all of the above. After my time as a Navy SEAL, I tried doing what the world prescribed. Some of those methods can offer temporary relief, like a psychological numbing agent. Maybe more like a band-aid on a deep shrapnel wound.
But relief is not restoration. The truth that no influencer wants to admit is that you cannot fix a broken soul with a human routine. True, permanent healing only began for me when I stopped looking for a self-made fix, dropped my ego, and started seeking the Lord with all of my heart. That is when the scales finally fell off my eyes.
Why am I so passionate about this? Because I’ve lived through the wreckage and found the only true and lasting way out of the darkness.
Allow Yourself to Be Led
I used to treat the Bible like a rigid command checklist. I think a lot of men do the same thing. I looked at the sheer size of the Bible, got overwhelmed, and then forced myself into a strict “Bible in a year” reading plan just to check a box at the end of the day.
Checking boxes doesn’t cleanse a troubled mind or heal a broken heart. Forcing myself through two chapters a day out of obligation wasn’t doing anything for my soul because I was treating it like homework. I wasn’t listening to the Lord.
Developing what I call the Unafraid mindset requires breaking free from obligation and performance and learning to be led directly by God. I had to realize that God doesn’t operate on my timeline.
Today, I might sit down and read a verse, and I might stop right there. I might sit with that one verse for an hour, a day, or a week if that’s where the Lord is guiding me. The inspired Word of God isn’t a textbook we have to memorize. It is a living truth, and its purpose is to cleanse your mind, heal the physical ailments brought on by chronic stress, and tear down the trauma in our minds.
We have built a system that tells us we have to perform perfectly through our own strength, but real power and healing only show up when you stop trying to micro-manage the process and let the Lord guide your steps.
The Violent Reality of Our Freedom
We can’t experience the true healing power of Christ if we only engage with a sanitized, comfortable version of Him. Modern culture has turned faith into something soft that doesn’t challenge us.
But the day that Jesus went to the cross wasn’t comfortable. It was brutal, bloody, and a highly coordinated public execution. They stopped at 39 lashes because they knew a 40th could kill a man, and they wanted Him alive to feel every ounce of pain. They ripped His beard out, spit on Him, and mocked Him. They forced a crown of thorns into His skull. He carried a heavy, raw wooden cross, with splinters digging into his open wounds.
Christ took on the spiritual weight of all of our sins and failures. He could have stopped the execution at any second. He could have called down the armies of Heaven and stopped it all at any time, but He chose to stay on that cross. Why?
Because He saw you. And He saw me. He saw our hidden battles, our addictions, and the heavy pressure we carry into our marriages and careers each day.
Living Unafraid means looking squarely at that sacrifice and knowing we no longer have to fight our battles all alone. In life, your times of struggle will hit: seasons of loss, suffering, and brokenness, where everything feels dark. But as men of faith, we operate with a baseline certainty: there is no resurrection without suffering. There is no victory without the cross.
If life feels heavy right now, don’t quit. You are just in the thick of a season that will end. Hold the line. Stay obedient. Look up. Your victory is coming.
Join the Ranks
Don’t try to white-knuckle through worldly coping mechanisms that leave you empty. Get connected with men who are chasing real truth and faith. Join the community here.